Graciously Embracing Getting Old

Life is full of complex processes of growth, change, maturity, and connection, as well as those of loss and aging. Wisdom lies in knowing the season of life that you’re in and investing yourself accordingly for your well-being and that of others around you, especially as you are getting old.

Among other things, when it comes to getting old, we often find ourselves resisting it or resigning ourselves to it. There is a third way – it’s possible to embrace getting old and appreciate that season of life.

The effects of getting old.

Depending on who you ask, being “old” can start as early as twenty-five. Of course, if you ask the 40 or even the 70-year-old, being 25 marks the summer of one’s youth. There is a sense, then, that being “old” is a matter of perspective.

There’s a saying that “You’re as young or as old as you feel” that leans quite heavily into that way of thinking. Aging is a matter of perspective, and you can choose to look at your age from a different standpoint.

The thinking behind that saying “You’re as young or as old as you feel” is to counteract the limitations that often accompany getting older. Because getting older is associated with life slowing down, things getting less exciting, or one’s vitality slipping away, having a mindset that insists on enjoying life despite one’s age is a helpful corrective to a resignation that can settle on people as they get older.

Having said that, the other side of the coin is that one can also just as easily resist the reality of getting older by refusing to act in a manner that aligns with their age. There is a world of difference between youthful exuberance, on the one hand, and recklessness or immaturity.

It’s possible to be youthful while recognizing the limits of your body and marking the passage of time appropriately. Celebrating your fortieth year of life for the tenth time or denying the gray hairs that are popping up everywhere might signal that you aren’t accepting the reality of getting older.

When you get older, there are some objective realities that you need to deal with. Understanding these limits while holding onto a zest for life is a way to avoid either resisting or resigning yourself to getting old. Some of the effects of getting old include the following:

• Our bodies don’t heal as quickly from injury or illness.
• Our bodies become more susceptible to illness and certain disorders such as hearing loss, dementia, depression, obstructive pulmonary disease, diabetes, stroke, or cataracts.
• One’s memory and ability to concentrate may decline.
• Physical activity can become more difficult as one’s heart and other muscle fiber weakens, especially if one is used to a sedentary lifestyle.
• Hormones fluctuate and affect sexual drive as well as the reproductive cycle.
• Hair loss and a decrease in one’s visual acuity and hearing.
• Experiencing loss of loved ones, as well as other significant life changes such as retirement, loss of function, or needing to be relocated to more appropriate housing for ongoing care.

As a person experiences these and other changes that come with getting older, they may or may not have the emotional, social, and psychological resources to deal with them. Poor adjustment to the realities of aging and the changes that it brings can result in low self-esteem, anxiety, depression, family relationship problems, and so on. This is to say nothing of other challenges that can also occur including elder abuse or being exposed to scams that target older Americans.

Embracing the aging process.

Getting old can be something that you look at negatively. Doing this makes it something to either resist wholeheartedly, or to resign yourself to. It doesn’t have to be either of these. The other way to look at getting old is to see it as a new phase of life that will teach you new things about yourself, and in which you can love and serve those around you in different ways than before.

There’s a passage in the book of Ecclesiastes that says,

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens – Ecclesiastes 3:1, NIV

It goes on to list all of the things that can happen during a lifetime, but what it is communicating is that the way of wisdom is to know what season you’re in and to respond to it appropriately. A few ways of graciously embracing getting old include:

• Cultivating or fostering healthy relationships with loved ones.
• Prioritize your physical, emotional, and mental health. Eat well, get sufficient rest, make regular exercise a part of your life, and take up practices such as mindfulness and gratitude
• Pursue learning and new things such as hobbies or learning how to handle technology.
• Find ways to serve. You could volunteer in your community or become a mentor to younger people so that you share your skills and experiences with them.

If you find yourself struggling with getting older and the challenges that each new season brings, you can also speak with a counselor who specializes in aging and geriatric issues, or a life coach who can help you as your transition toward retirement.